Pregnancy

My first appointment was with an OBGYN group that I always went to for check ups. I didn’t think much of it, but figured that’s who I would call when I found out I was pregnant. As time went on, I quickly realized the assigned doctor was not a good fit for me. Every appointment we waited 45 minutes to be seen for 5 minutes. She would go on rants about my weight gain as I had gained quite a bit within the first trimester. I was stressed and had experienced multiple deaths in the family, so losing weight while pregnant was the least of my concerns. The last appointment we had with her I complained of still being nauseous and how eating was the only way to not vomit. She legit told me… “Just let yourself throw up. At this point you have to stop gaining so much weight.”

Her words stabbed me. Every appointment my blood pressure would creep higher and higher. She fear mongered me into getting the flu shot by telling me my baby would die if I didn’t. She also told me I would never be able to breastfeed (to which I did for 31 months to be exact). At our 20 week appointment she got up and left the room without saying bye. We weren’t sure if the appointment was over or what was happening. I did some research and started looking into hiring a doula, a photographer, and tried to get help creating a birth plan. When I found myself so uncomfortable that I couldn’t ask my doctor basic questions, I decided it was time to switch doctors.

I called the front office and explained my situation, and they put in a request to see a different doctor in the same practice. A few days later they called me back telling me they are denying my request as it’s too late in pregnancy to transfer. I told them, “So what do I do when I’m not comfortable with the doctor? You’re going to make me stay with a doctor I can’t even talk to?”. Her response: “Where would you like your records transferred to?”

I was too far along to switch doctors within the same practice, but they were totally fine with kicking me out completely? I felt like I was already failing as a Mother. I immediately called the local birth center and told them my situation, and I had my records transferred to them. They gladly accepted me as a late transfer!

My first appointment at the birth center was 2.5 hours long to catch up! I couldn’t believe how much they cared about me and my wellbeing. Every appointment after that went over an hour and I was treated like a human being instead of just a number. Better yet, they didn’t care that I had gained so much weight and they completely agreed that the stress I had endured would 100% have caused me to gain as much as I did.

We took birthing classes called Birthing From Within, which completely resonates now that I’ve been documenting births for many years. I didn’t know what labor was like or what contractions felt like, but I knew at the time I didn’t want to be loud. It’s like every new Mom’s worry was making noise and being loud in labor. I am so thankful for this course as it taught me to trust my body and just follow it’s lead when labor did come.

Birth

As I reached my due date I received every text from every family member wondering where my baby was. Boy that was my biggest pet peeve! The only texts I ever replied to were the ones where they were asking how I was, not wondering why the heck my baby wasn’t here already! 2 days passed my due date and I was DONE. My doula came over to just be with me, walk with me, talk with me, and massage my feet. Later that evening I started having a few contractions that were different than the others I had been having.

Throughout the night, the contractions kept waking me up. I couldn’t get comfortable, and sometimes I would have to breathe through them to get by. Still, though, I wasn’t sure if this was real. I had made so many false calls within the last couple of weeks, I was going to make sure this was real before I call anyone again. I texted our doula to update her and I told her “If these contractions aren’t real, then labor is going to totally suck!” She told me GO FOR A WALK! She had me to go walk right away. come home, take a break, rest, and then go back for a walk. We did about a mile and a half and then took a break. I began coloring in an adult coloring book with really cool designs, needing to stop and breathe through the intense contractions. A couple of hours later I get another text from her saying “GO FOR A WALK!” Okay, I was starting to get pretty annoyed… but my husband wanting to do things right, dragged me out the door and we went for a walk. We talked about 2.5 miles total throughout the day. After that last walk, we got inside and I laid on the couch saying “I am taking a freaking nap! I don’t care what anyone says!” POP. My water broke in a huge gush!

My husband panicked and called our doula and the midwife. About 30 minutes later I was half naked and on my birth ball moaning and groaning with pain! My doula arrived and hung out with us to see how I was doing, and about an hour later she said it was time to go. In the birthing classes we took, we were told that if someone told you it was time to go and you didn’t want to get in the car, then you knew it was real active labor. So when I told our doula, “No!” and she responded with, “See, this is proof that it’s real!” I walked out with just a robe and could care less if anyone saw me half naked!

When they tell you that the car rides suck… believe them! THE CAR RIDE SUCKS!!!! Being in active labor in a car is the worst thing in the world! I was sure everyone looking at me through the window thought I was dying! I was screaming, nearly pulling the handle off the roof of the car, (and don’t forget, naked!) The next thing I remember was our midwife asking for a urine sample, then me complaining about having to give her one, and then doing it and ditching my underwear in the hallway and walking to the room I had chosen to birth in. Ha! Apparently I was supposed to go into the room where we had our appointments at to be checked. No one told me this was the plan! I was there to have my baby gosh dang it!

I was 5cm when arriving and got in the tub right after. Literally the BEST thing ever! The birth notes I received after said that I shouted multiple times “This hurts like a b!tch!”, and asking if it was too late for an epidural during pushing. I remember my body completely taking over and bearing down and I had no clue that’s what I was doing. I asked my doula, “Am I in transition yet?” and her response was “Oh honey, you were in transition a long time ago.” Between contractions I made jokes, laughed, talked, and was my normal self according to my husband and doula. I completely surrendered to Labor Land and I was gone.

It was almost 10 pm when my Mom decided to take my stepdad home. She told me that our midwife told her “she’s coming to the end of labor and pushing, but since it’s her first baby she could be here another 3 hours or so. Go ahead and go home and come back, you have time.” Literally right after they left, the midwife asked my husband to call my Mom back and tell her to turn around and come back.

After 3 hours at the birth center and the last 30 minutes of screaming pushing (It was intense y’all!), Claire was born! She came out sunny-side-up, with the cord wrapped around her neck, and her shoulders got a little stuck. I had to get in squatting position for her to come out completely, but over all I had zero complications (besides having 3rd degree tearing). She came earth-side calm, peaceful, so happy to be in my arms!

Welcome to the world Baby Claire, born September 13, 2015 at 10:07 pm. 8 pounds 11 ounces and 21 inches long.

Some important things I learned from this

  1. The only people who should be at your birth are the ones that have a job. And each person should have only 1 job, not 2 or 3. If we had hired our doula to also do photography, I wouldn’t have had her full attention when I needed her the most. I didn’t want her to ever leave my side, and every contraction I called for her.
  2. Know what type of labor you want. Know your coping method. Take a class. Take several classes. We wouldn’t have survived if it wasn’t for the class we took.
  3. Trust your body!!!
  4. If you aren’t happy with your provider, don’t settle! Find a new one ASAP! You are the most important person in your birth space, your voice should be heard. The people you pick to be on your birth team should be there for you to honor you, not be there for themselves for a pretty penny.
  5. Most importantly, hire a birth photographer! You will want to remember this! All these beautiful pictures I have of me and my doula, I would have never known this was our relationship during labor and birth. I do not remember this at all. I don’t remember kissing my husband and him being affectionate. Hire someone to take photos, and make sure that’s all they are there to do!

The OB/GYN we had was Dr. Satterfield from Seven Oaks Women’s Center in San Antonio, Texas.

The 2 midwives on our team was Erika Obert and Cindy Lockhart from San Antonio Birth Center in San Antonio, Texas.

The 2 midwives who attended our birth was Cindy Lokhart and Alisa Voss Godfrey (which our birth was her 924th birth!)

Our AMAZING Doula was Desiree Sangiuliano-Jemal from Pretty Sweet Doula.

Our AMAZING Birth Photographer was Brittany Reynosa from Brittany Brooks Photography.